News Onicia Updates

Selling a movie to a major studio?? — Onicia Update

TL;DR: I almost sold a movie to [Big-name American Studio], and search engine optimization (SEO) and content marketing were my secret weapons. 

Today, I’m sharing the tale of the little island gyal who believed she could—and almost did. In 2007, I enrolled in INHolland University of Applied Sciences to study marketing and communication. My mom told me that if I wanted to be a writer/artist, I should learn skills that would advance my art or become my backup career. 

The plan: Use marketing to create organic buzz around my writing and network my way to the top. I didn’t know what the top was, but I knew marketing and ranking on Google were my tools to get there. 

Around 2018, my website needs began to surpass my technical abilities. So in March 2020, I hired erica Dreisbach, an amazing web developer in Chicago, to upgrade my website.

“I want my website to appear at the top of search engine results when a film or TV executive searches for ‘Caribbean screenwriter’ or ‘Chicago screenwriter.’” With the goal set out, erica got the clicking and clacking and whipped up a super website. 

An amazing thing happened on February 12, 2021. Rebbecca (not actual name), a Creative Executive at [Big Studio], slid into my HeyOnicia[at]OniciaMuller[dot]com inbox.

Subject line: Hello from [Big Studio]!!

Rebbecca was looking for me, the Caribbean screenwriter who ranked high on Google! Anyways, seven loglines and two synopses later, [Big Studio] did not buy my movie idea, but we parted on happy terms. They’re looking forward to reading more of my work.

Shout out to the good web developer, erica Dreisbach for creating a bomb a$$ SEO optimized website. Shout out to past me for developing and executing a targeted and consistent content marketing strategy.

News Onicia Updates

I produced a TV pilot! — Onicia Update


Having a television show that runs for 3+ seasons is one of my big career goals. Filming a pilot is a looooong way from that goal, but it is a major milestone. I won’t share the entire pilot because we’re shopping the idea and seeking additional funding to produce the other 5 episodes of season 1. However, I can share the trailer. 

Special thanks to Peter Sagnia for trusting me with his story idea and to Diane de la Haye and Maya Montrell for providing additional writing and story support.

When I have a moment, I’ll post the full project details with cast and crew info. Please, ‘like’, share, and leave a comment.

2021 Resolution and Goals
In December, I shared that I didn’t want to make plans for 2021, but I lowkey felt inspired to write and workshop a new half-hour pilot. I also wanted to rest more. Well, I did just that. I took the entire month of January off. I feel pretty refreshed.

I wrote a new pilot called Matched. Very thankful to my friends Devin Whitlock and erica Dreisbach for their feedback and encouragement. Now I have a kickin’ script to submit to Sundance’s Episodic Lab and Warner Media Access’ (f.k.a. HBOAccess) fellowship.

On set of The Wonderful Counsellor, a Caribbean TV drama by Peter Sagnia and Onicia Muller

Want to own an original Onicia Greetings? Buy a greeting card from my online store. Cards not your thing? Consider sending me ice cream money. Full disclosure: sometimes, I buy cookies instead of ice cream.

Lastly, I want to thank the GOOD web developer erica dreisbach for creating my new WordPress website. Holla at her. 

Looking for a content writer or editorHire me to write snappy blogs, articles or witty social media posts! HeyOnicia[at]niciaMuller[dot]com

Comedy Sketches

Juicero 101 — a masterclass in scamming by Onicia Muller

A masterclass in scamming sponsored by The Skewer


Juicero 101 is a masterclass in creating sticky, viral products and services that attract big-dollar investors, 15 minutes of fame, and early retirement. This FREE 7-point seminar is sponsored by The Skewer, a monthly live news revue satirizing the demon squall of this mad world. Start at 48:54.

As thanks for completing this seminar, I’m offering a discount code to my widely popular PayPal Panhandle, a 60-day, self-paced workshop about online panhandling with PayPal. Hurry this offer is unlimited!

Onicia Muller is a sales and marketing guru* with 10 years of internet trolling experience. She’s watched over 15 seasons of ratchet reality television. Most importantly she’s invested a total of zero dollars in business webinars and pyramid schemes. Claim your 90% off coupon for her PayPal Panhandle course.

*writer and comedian. I am not liable for anything unless, of course, you strike it big. In which case PayPal me 10% of profits. Please and thanks.